🍕 CAST IRON PIZZA (THE SLAY QUEEN VS. DEAD ASS SHOWDOWN)

Cast iron pans, homemade dough, & zero mercy from a couple of judges under the age of twelve.

PREP: 30 min COOK: 15 min TOTAL: 45 min SERVES: 4–6 DIFFICULTY: Easy (harder when the judges are related to you)

🥄 What You'll Need to Feel Better

Dough

  • 3 cups all-purpose flour

  • 1 tbsp sugar

  • 2 tsp instant yeast

  • 1 tsp salt

  • 1 cup warm water (110°F, not "I don't own a thermometer" warm)

  • 2 tbsp olive oil

Toppings (use as desired, this is a democracy)

  • 1½ cups pizza sauce, homemade or jarred, no judgment either way

  • 2 cups shredded mozzarella

  • ½ cup shredded Parmesan

  • Pepperoni slices

  • Italian sausage, cooked and crumbled

  • Bell peppers, mushrooms, onions, sliced

  • Fresh basil leaves

🔥 How to Cook Your Feelings

  1. Make the dough. Mix flour, yeast, sugar, and salt in a bowl. Add the warm water and olive oil, stir until it comes together. Knead 5–7 minutes until smooth and elastic. This is the part where you find out who in your kitchen actually knows what "elastic" means.

  2. Let it rest. Cover the dough and let it sit 10–15 minutes. Use this time to prep your toppings and, if applicable, assign team names. Ours were the Slay Queen and Dead Ass. We don't recommend explaining either one to your parents.

  3. Preheat everything. Put a cast iron pan in the oven and preheat to 475°F. Lightly oil the pan once it's hot, right before the dough goes in. Cast iron holds a grudge if you skip this step.

  4. Build it. Roll or press the dough into shape, spread the sauce, then layer on cheese and toppings. There is no wrong way to do this, though your competition will tell you otherwise.

  5. Bake. 12–15 minutes, until golden and bubbly. Rotate the pan halfway through so it browns evenly. Resist the urge to open the oven every 90 seconds to check.

  6. Serve and let the judges decide. Let it cool slightly before cutting, or don't, and burn the roof of your mouth like the rest of us. Present both pizzas to your judges and prepare to lose with dignity. Or without. We didn't.

💡 Feeling Tip:
“Let someone younger than you be the judge every once in a while. It's a good reminder that being right and being in charge aren't the same thing.”

For Caroline and Connelly, who beat us fair and square and have not let us forget it.